Jokes jokes and jokes

1.Answer my question.

The teacher, Mr Adi asks, "Putri, what part of the human body increases ten times when excited?"

Putri surprised and says, "That's disgusting, I won't even answer that question, Mr.Adi."

The teacher calls on Putra: "What part of the human body increases ten times when excited?"

"That's easy," says Putra. "It's the pupil of the eye."

"Very good, Putra," responds Mr. Adi. "That's correct."

He then turns to Putri and says, "First, you didn't made your homework. Second, you have a dirty mind. And third, you're in for a BIG disappointment."

2. Stupid Biologist

A biologist was interested in studying how far bullfrogs can jump. He brought a bullfrog into his laboratory, set it down, and commanded, "Jump, frog, jump!"

The frog jumped across the room.

The biologist measured the distance, then noted in his journal, "Frog with four legs jumped eight feet."

Then he cut the frog's front legs off. Again he ordered, "Jump, frog, jump!"

The frog struggled a moment, then jumped a few feet.

After measuring the distance, the biologist noted in his journal, "Frog with two legs jumped three feet."

Next, the biologist cut off the frog's back legs. Once more, he shouted, "Jump, frog, jump!"

The frog just lay there.

"Jump, frog, jump!" the biologist repeated.

Nothing.

The biologist noted in his journal, "Frog with no legs - lost its hearing."

3. What's the difference

What is the longest word in the English language? 

SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

4. which is the fastest?

What are the three quickest ways of spreading a rumour (or gossip).

• Telegram
• Telephone
• Tell a woman

5. who doesn't like my wife?

Fred is 32 years old and he is still single. 

One day a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?" 

Fred replied, "Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them." 

His friend thinks for a moment and says, "I've got the perfect solution, just find a girl who's just like your mother." 

A few months later they meet again and his friend says, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?" 

With a frown on his face, Fred answers, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much." 

The friend said, "Then what's the problem?" 

Fred replied, "My father doesn't like her."

6. Do you want more?

I read this blog and I smiles, just a little. Then, my mind asks me? "do you enjoy this reading?" and I answer, "No, anyway but I have to read this till the end." "Why?" because my teacher, Mr. Adi will ask me if I enjoy this forum or not?" And what happens if you do not read this joke?... Well "nothin' happens." So if nothing happens, Why you don't stop reading now? "If I just stop reading now, I will not know what the end of this joke, so I have to keep reading. Why you ask me these questions?"... "coz... I want you to read and read....

Keep reading a lot!!!!! members.. you are develoving your English for yourself..

See ya..........

Memo to all employees: (just a joke)

Memo to all employees: In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T). We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T than anyone else. If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T on the course, please see your supervisor. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T list and our supervisors are especially skilled at seeing you get all the S.H.I.T you can handle. Employees who don’t take their S.H.I.T will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T). Those who fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T). Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they don’t have to do S.H.I.T anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T already. If you are full of S.H.I.T you may be interested in a job teaching others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of LEADERS (B.U.L.L.S.H.I…T). For employees who are intending to pursue a career in management and consulting, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T). This course emphasizes how to manage M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TEACHING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T). Thank you, BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G.S.H.I.T) P.S. Now send this S.H.I.T to 5 people who need S.H.I.T in their life, just not the same person who sent you this S.H.I.T. They have already had their fill of S.H.I.T. Thank you for your time. ! Sincerely, The Director Under the Main Bureau of Super High Intensity Training. (The D.U.M.B.S.H.I.T)

(quoted from kinglish.com)

Welcome the new member of ECF

Hello and Welcome,

Hi, it is really great to have new members in English Community Forum. The best regard for you and I think You have come to the right place here with me to practise more your talented skill in English.

Here in this blog, I am trying also practising my skill by writing some ideas I have in mind and I would like to share with other people, including you the new members.So by joining this forum you will be free to write and share anything you are interested in. No matter what you are writing, just go ahead step by step. No worries of mistakes because we learn from our mistakes.

I will be so much happy when you keep practising your English. English Community Forum in English Forum Bali blog is a matched link for you to a better English mastery.


Keep writing here and whenever you find a problem, do not hesitate to let me know it and I will give you my hand.


Best regard,


Adin (the admin)